Announcement & Prayer Request February 6, 2026There is no easy way to start this description. So I will get right into it. On January 16, 2026, it came to light that I had been engaging in inappropriate conversations with a woman and with chatbots through apps and texting, seeking and soliciting inappropriate images. Our daughters first discovered this, and in that moment, I did not tell them the truth. It was only after several hours of conversation between Lacey and me that the full extent of what had been happening came to light. This is in addition to something we shared with our board in the fall of 2025 — that I had returned to pornography for about 9 months after experiencing sixteen years of freedom. There is no excuse for the choices I made. They were sinful, manipulative, deceptive, and deeply hurtful to my wife and girls. Bringing this into the light is incredibly painful and embarrassing to my ...READ POST

What surfaced when the noise stopped? January 26, 2026 If you’re finishing this social media fast, the most important question isn’t “Did I make it 21 days?”   It’s “What surfaced when the noise stopped?”   For many of us, stepping away didn’t just remove scrolling — it revealed things that were already there. Emotions we’d been numbing. Thoughts we’d been ignoring. Longings we hadn’t even realized.   Social media didn’t create those things; it helped us avoid them. So let me ask a few honest questions — not for guilt, but for clarity. What showed up in the silence? Was it boredom? Anxiety? Loneliness? Relief? Creativity? A sense of loss? Those things matter. They tell you what social media has been managing for you.   Where did you feel the pull to be seen or affirmed? When the likes disappeared, did anything in you feel unsettled or unworthy? That doesn’t mean you’re shallow — it means you’re human. The question simply reveals where the affirmation of other humans has been taking precedence ...READ POST

Why giving up social media feels harder than it should! January 19, 2026 If you’re reading this and you’re in our third week (view previous emails by clicking here) of a January social media fast, I want to say this first: this isn’t about guilt or comparison. This fast isn’t a test — it’s an invitation to awareness, freedom, and rest.   Most of us don’t stay on social media because we love it. We stay because it meets very real emotional needs — and exposes some quiet fears we don’t always like to admit.   Here are a few of the real reasons stepping away feels so difficult.   First, we’re afraid of missing out. We want to be “in the know” — about news, trends, family updates, and cultural conversations. There’s an unspoken fear that if we log off, we’ll fall behind or be out of touch. But staying constantly informed doesn’t actually make us wiser; it usually just makes us more anxious. Scripture reminds us that wisdom ...READ POST

If not social media… then what? January 12, 2026 One of the biggest hesitations I had in leaving social media 5 years ago wasn’t about the scrolling — it was the relationships.   “How will I keep up with my friends and what they’re doing?”   “What about staying in touch with my family?”   “What if I miss something important? I don’t want to hurt their feelings by not knowing.”   These were real concerns.   For many of us, social media has become the default way to stay connected — especially with extended family, old friends, or people we don’t often see. For me, the choice to step back didn’t mean choosing isolation. It was an intentional choice to engage in more meaningful and healthier forms of relational connection.   In the years since saying goodbye to social media, these are some simple alternatives that have created more meaningful relationships, not fewer:   Call Someone. Yes, actually call. Believe me, it feels awkward at first because we’re out of practice, but hearing ...READ POST

What If You Fasted This Instead? January 5, 2026 Most of us start the year thinking about diets, budgets, or gym memberships. All good things. But what if the most transformative fast to begin the year isn’t about food at all?   What if it’s about attention?   Social media isn’t neutral. It shapes what we fear, what we compare, what we celebrate, and what we carry emotionally. Even a few minutes of scrolling can quietly train our minds toward outrage, envy, anxiety, or distraction. And the hard truth is this: what you consistently give your attention to is what eventually disciples you.   That’s why a 21-day social media fast can be one of the healthiest ways to start the year.   Twenty-one days isn’t about punishment or proving a point. It’s long enough to notice what social media has been doing to you — yet short enough to feel possible. Research indicates that it takes approximately three weeks to break patterns of dependency and start ...READ POST

Holiday (Christmas) Newsletter & We’ve started a non-profit! December 29, 2025 As we come to the close of another year, we want to take a moment to share a bit of the story behind the work you’ve been engaging with — and where it’s headed.   BUT FIRST — our daughter, Arianna, created our family’s Holiday/Christmas card and I wanted to share it with you. Simply click the following link to view our family’s Christmas Newsletter! https://www.canva.com/design…   Cultivate Relationships, LLC was created to develop biblical teaching, discipleship tools, and ministry resources designed to help people experience healing, freedom, and transformation in Jesus. Over time, as churches and leaders began using these resources, a consistent need became clear: churches didn’t just need content — they needed training, structure, and support to implement ministry safely, biblically, and well.   Out of that need, we’re excited to announce that this year, Cultivate Ministries, Inc. was formed as a U.S. 501(c)(3) nonprofit. Cultivate Ministries exists to take the resources we create ...READ POST

3 final Christmas “facts” most Christians get wrong… December 22, 2025 As I wrap up this series on Christmas “facts” Christians get wrong, I want to keep gently poking at some of the things we assume we “know” about Christmas but often get wrong. Not to ruin traditions — but to help us see how much deeper, richer, and more intentional this season really is.   Here are three final Christmas facts that usually surprise people:   7. Jesus was almost certainly not born on December 25. The Bible never gives us a date for Jesus’ birth. December 25 was chosen centuries later, not to baptize paganism, but to anchor Christian celebration around the incarnation in a world already structured by festivals and calendars. Early Christians weren’t trying to sneak pagan worship into the church — they were intentionally centering time itself around Jesus’ arrival. Christmas was less about historical precision and more about theological proclamation: God entered human history.   8. “Peace on earth” didn’t mean the ...READ POST

3 MORE Christmas “facts” most Christians get wrong… December 15, 2025 As we continue this Christmas series, here’s one of the most surprising (and often misunderstood) truths about Jesus’ birth: he didn’t just fulfill some of the Hebrew Scriptures — he fulfilled all of them.   There is no prophecy in the Hebrew Scriptures still awaiting a “future fulfillment” beyond what Jesus already accomplished and what he will finish at the final resurrection (as the New Testament clearly states). Everything that the Torah, the Prophets, and the Writings pointed toward in Israel’s story finds its fulfillment in Jesus the Messiah. Christmas isn’t just the beginning of the story — it’s the moment Israel’s (and the world’s) centuries-long hope finally became a reality in human history.   So, here are three MORE facts that most Christians don’t realize about how completely Jesus fulfilled the Hebrew Scriptures:   4. Jesus fulfilled the entire story arc of Israel — not just isolated verses! The Hebrew Scriptures aren’t a scattered list of ...READ POST

3 Christmas “facts” most Christians get wrong… December 8, 2025 Since we’re now officially in the Christmas season, we’re also entering that magical time when half of what people believe about Christmas is… well… not exactly accurate. Over the next couple of weeks, I will be sharing facts and details about Christmas and the Advent season that most people don’t know or that have been misunderstood.   So here are the first three Christmas facts most people get wrong — not to ruin the fun, but to deepen your joy and wonder at what God actually did.   1. The Magi didn’t show up the night Jesus was born! I LOVE hiding the three wise men in nativity scenes whenever I go to my friends’ houses BECAUSE every nativity scene you’ve ever owned is lying to you. Matthew 2 says the magi visited Jesus in a house — not the manger — and Herod’s attempt to kill all boys two years old and under tells ...READ POST

My Bible Study Pet Peeve December 1, 2025 One of my biggest pet peeves in group Bible studies or when I am talking to someone about a passage of Scripture is when someone says, “Well… I think this passage means…”   I don’t want to know what we think it means. Scripture doesn’t bend to our opinions. The Bible has a single meaning, given by the Holy Spirit who inspired it.   The Spirit both inspired the text (He gave it meaning) and illuminates the text (He makes it personally significant). Without Him, we turn the Scriptures into moral advice, political commentary, or a self-help book. With Him, we see Jesus — because all of Scripture points to him (Revelation 19.10).   There are two essential mindsets we must bring to every passage:   MINDSET #1 – The Bible is a unified story that points to Jesus Jesus repeatedly asked the scholars of His day, “Have you not read…?” (There are at least thirty-four times he did ...READ POST

My obligatory thankfulness post… for Thanksgiving! November 24, 2025 I know what you’re thinking: “It’s Thanksgiving week, so of course Nathan is writing a post about gratitude.”   100%.   But it’s also much more personal than a holiday reminder — this has become survival for me.   Over the last couple of months, I’ve had to reclaim the habit of intentional gratitude because my own thought-life was drifting toward disappointment and discouragement. And when I stop practicing intentional thankfulness, my mind gets negative real fast. But when I return to the habit of thankfulness, the enemy’s whispers of frustration and weariness slowly begin to fade into the background.   Science reveals this reality as well.   Studies from UC Davis, Harvard Health, and Greater Good Science Center show that regular gratitude practices reduce anxiety and depression, improve sleep, strengthen resilience, and even decrease stress hormones in the body. Gratitude literally rewires the brain — strengthening the neural pathways for hope, peace, and joy.   God knew this, which is why ...READ POST

Is God in Control — or Just in Charge? November 10, 2025 For most of my life, growing up in the American-Christian culture, I heard well-meaning Christians say, “Don’t worry — God’s in control.” It sounds like a comforting platitude, but for a while now, it has raised some troubling questions for me: if God controls everything, then what’s the point of prayer? Why would Jesus teach us to ask, seek, and knock if everything were already decided? And, if God is in control, then there are a lot of evil things taking place that should make every Christian question their loyalty to Him?   As I have read and studied the Scriptures, they seem to paint a richer, more relational picture of God. He is in charge — He reigns over creation — but He isn’t a micromanager. He is sovereign enough to give His creation genuine freedom, choosing to work within humanity’s boundaries rather than controlling it like a puppet master. His ...READ POST

Don’t Worry About Israel — Jesus Already Fulfilled It November 3, 2025 I’ve been watching, like many of you, the ongoing conflict between Israel and Palestine over the past few years. It’s one of those topics I’ve intentionally avoided writing about for a while. But with all the recent peace talks and renewed attention, I felt it might be the right time to share something that’s been on my heart.   I’ve already gone much deeper into this subject in my podcast series on the book of Galatians.   There’s been a lot of noise lately about Israel — headlines, political unrest, “fulfilled prophecies”, and global speculation. But if we’re not careful, that noise can distract us from the simple truth: Jesus has already fulfilled what historical Israel was always meant to point to.   When God formed Israel, it was never meant to end with geography or ethnicity — it was meant to point to a people who would reveal His kingdom to the world. That promise ...READ POST

Is Control A Disguise for Maturity? October 27, 2025 For years, I had a special mechanical pencil I loved — a perfectly weighted, smooth-writing, irreplaceable tool that helped me map out my perfectly articulated theological prose and soliloquies. Whenever I misplaced it, I’d turn the house upside down in an effort to find it. My wife, in a frustratedly, exhausted (yet completely unhelpful) manner, would just follow me around saying, “Stop looking for it. It will show up eventually.”   That pencil taught me something about myself — perfectionism, anxiety, and overwhelm all come from the same place — the need to feel in control. They whisper, “If I just try harder, plan better, or think longer, I’ll finally feel peace.” But the truth is, those things only show what happens when we try to live without the Holy Spirit.   Control says, “If I can just figure out how to manage this, I’ll have peace of mind.”   The Holy Spirit says, “If you ...READ POST

Struggle Isn’t A Setback — It’s How Faith Grows! October 20, 2025 When I was a kid, I spent a lot of time in the hospital because of cystic fibrosis. Long sleepless nights, loads of needle pokes, and a constant flow of nurses and respiratory therapists coming in at all hours became normal. What wasn’t normal — or at least what hurt the most — was being there without my parents. Not always, but without my brothers or mom and dad constantly there, it felt lonely. I found it exhausting to constantly fight the lie that I was rejected. As a child, I desperately wanted to be understood in my struggle. I wanted someone to “get it.” But what I eventually realized was that wanting to feel understood by others was an unreasonable expectation.   No one can fully understand the details of someone else’s struggle — not the exhaustion, the pain, or the hidden fears that come with it. People can, however, relate ...READ POST

Is the World Getting Darker or Lighter? October 13, 2025 Over the course of my life, I have had several medical procedures. The worst one was a few years ago for an emergency resection of my colon. I’ll spare you the gory details, but needless to say, the recovery was LOOONG and excruciating. I still have a weird, balbous and lumpy abdomen as a result.   If you’ve ever had surgery, you know the healing process can be painful, slow, and at times, discouraging. I’ve never had cancer or a tumor, but depending on the location or how much it has spread, even in a successful removal, the healing process can take months.   But a difficult recovery doesn’t mean the tumor is still there. That’s how Jesus’ Kingdom works. When he came 2000 years ago, he performed the surgery the world desperately needed — he removed the cancer of sin, death, and the enemy’s power. And just like a body slowly heals after ...READ POST

We Crave Connection Yet Run From Vulnerability. October 6, 2025 I’ve been told many times — by men’s ministries and well-meaning mentors — that my wife shouldn’t be my accountability partner because she is the “weaker vessel” and can’t carry the weight of my struggles. But that has never made sense to me (unless I am trying to get away with something). She is my wife. We are one. If I can’t be most vulnerable with her, then who should I be? For me, she is my primary accountability partner, and I believe that’s by God’s design.   The Hebrew Scriptures back this up. In Genesis 2.25, the word for “naked” is ‘arummim — meaning exposed, open, vulnerable. Adam and Eve were naked and felt no shame. They were exposed and open, vulnerable with one another for the purpose of being fully known. But in Genesis 3.7, after the garden rebellion, the word shifts to ‘erummim — still naked, but now it carries ...READ POST

Friends, Followers, and Socializing September 29, 2025 We live in the most “connected” moment in history, and yet loneliness, anxiety, and depression are at record highs. Social media promises community, but what it actually delivers is an endless scroll of comparison, outrage, and curated highlight reels. It’s a counterfeit form of relationship.   Research shows that heavy social media use increases depression, disrupts sleep, and rewires the brain to crave the dopamine “hit” of scrolls, likes, and notifications. Ironically, the very people who built these platforms know the dangers and designed them into their code and algorithms.   Social media designers and executives often do not allow their own children to use the platforms they create. This practice is widely reported among leaders in the tech industry, who are aware of the addictive design features and potential harms associated with social media. For example, executives at Facebook, TikTok, and other major platforms have stated they restrict their children’s access to these ...READ POST

God Told Me… September 22, 2025 In Bible school, I had a friend who claimed that God told him he would marry at least five different women during his time there. Coming from a conservative church background (where I was never really taught how to hear God’s voice), his week-to-week “revelations” didn’t exactly build my confidence that God actually spoke.   Almost 25 years later, and after 21 years of marriage, I’ve realized that hearing God’s voice is actually a lot like being married. At first, I thought I understood my wife pretty well. And while I can usually read her now, she’s still full of surprises. Relationship takes time, trust, and daily practice.   Hearing God works the same way. It’s not about getting it perfect — it’s about growing in relationship.   Here are a few things I’ve learned about hearing God’s voice and learning to walk with Him:   Pray Specific Questions. Instead of “God, bless me today,” try, “Holy Spirit, what ...READ POST

When evil seems loud, God is scheming louder! September 15, 2025 Last week’s assassination of Charlie Kirk shook many. It’s been heartbreaking, infuriating, and sobering to see evil take such a public swing at someone who has committed his life to declaring and defending the Truth. Moments like this make it feel like the world is spinning out of control — like darkness is advancing unchecked.   In times like these, I must choose to remember Joseph’s words in Genesis 50.20: “What others have schemed for harm, God schemes for good.” Evil may be scheming, but God is scheming louder. And His plans always trump the enemy.   When I flip on the light in my dark tin shed, it feels chaotic as all the critters scatter. But the light isn’t the problem. It’s actually the solution. The increase in visibility amidst darkness is not proof that evil is getting stronger, bigger, or louder — it’s evidence that God’s light is shining into more places ...READ POST

Thanksgiving = The Answer to All Your Problems September 8, 2025 In 2019, I went through one of the most depressing seasons of my life. I had just had major surgery where part of my colon had to be removed. During the surgery, I was woken up by the surgeon to make a decision that I had feared would happen since I was a little kid. Between the surgery, being woken up, and the lasting effects the surgery had on my body, this depression was the most difficult and darkest season I have ever walked through. It had gotten so bad that my family had to literally do an intervention.   In prayer, one of the things the Holy Spirit led me to do was journal things I was thankful for from the day. By the end of 2020, this habit — along with several other practical steps He had me take that year (including only listening to worship — click here to ...READ POST

Avoid Parked Cars… Your Teeth Will Thank You. September 1, 2025 When I was younger, I knocked out my front teeth in a bike accident. I had seen the parked cars when I began my ride and would have sworn to anyone who asked that I was at least a half a block away from them. But I was completely unaware of how quickly I was moving toward the parked truck because I was sidetracked by a girls’ soccer game. Had I been more aware of my surroundings, I would have noticed the danger I was heading straight for.   The same is true spiritually.   We can get so sidetracked by our circumstances — and feelings of disappointment and frustration — that we lose track of how our own unhealthy mindsets and behaviors can hurt us. Habits form quickly, often without us realizing it, and soon they carry us into situations we never meant to be in. But transformation doesn’t come from trying harder ...READ POST

Do NOT minister to this person… August 25, 2025 As Christians, we do not have a choice but to make disciples. It is literally our job description.   However, one of the hardest parts of discipleship is not just who we are willing to minister to, but who God is actually highlighting to us. The Spirit leads us to people — not our own preference, guilt, or sense of obligation. That being said, the Scriptures do give us some clear warnings about people.   Here are four examples of people we need to be on guard with:   1. The Unrepentant (or the willfully disobedient) Paul says in 1 Corinthians 5.11 not to associate with someone who calls themselves a brother but shows a pattern of willfully giving into known unhealthy behaviors and sins. With this type of person, ask God for discernment to see if they truly desire a life change before investing deeply in them. This may include asking the Holy Spirit to reveal ...READ POST

The Bible wasn’t written to you… August 18, 2025 Several years ago, our family moved to Ireland, and one of the first things we learned was that you will always be offered tea. What we didn’t realize, though, is that if you accept it right away, it comes across as forthright and entitled. The polite thing is to refuse it one or two times before finally “giving in” and accepting. Much of Irish culture works this way. It’s the same reason you can’t just say “bye” once and hang up the phone — that would seem rude and abrupt. Instead, you say “bye, bye, bye” repeatedly, while slowly hanging up the call.   Needless to say, most of our time in Ireland had Lacey and me unintentionally coming across as forthright, entitled, rude, and abrasive — simply because we hadn’t yet learned the culture and taken the time to discover how people there think and behave.   The Bible works the same way.   Every ...READ POST

What if Jesus can’t relate to you? August 11, 2025 I remember sitting as a kid in a wooden pew, staring up at a painting of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane inside our old brick Congregational church, thinking, “There’s no way he gets me. He’s God.” You probably know the painting — Jesus with a soft glow around His head like a holy Chernobyl survivor, hands perfectly folded, peacefully gazing up at some celestial spotlight in the clouds. (If that doesn’t sound familiar, do yourself a favor and Google “Christ in the Garden of Gethsemane by Heinrich Hofmann.” Tell me that’s not exactly what I just described.)   Have you ever thought that — “Yeah, but Jesus was Jesus — I’m just me”? Totally human, totally flawed, totally overwhelmed.   But here’s the thing — so was Jesus (to clarify, flawed as in human, not flawed as in sinner).   Hebrews 2.17 says, “Therefore, He had to be made like His brothers in all things…” ...READ POST

Break-Through Requires Follow-Through August 4, 2025 We’ve all been there — a powerful moment of prayer, tears shed, truth spoken, breakthrough felt. And then… we get up, go home, and wake up the next morning feeling the same way, struggling with the same temptations, or continuing to grieve the same loss.   Don’t get me wrong — prayer is powerful. James 5.16 says the prayer of a righteous person “can accomplish much.” But the pattern of Scripture shows that prayer often ends with a next step. God speaks, moves, or convicts — and then expects a response.   When Jesus healed people, He usually followed it with an activation step: “Go, show yourself to the priest” (Luke 17.14). “Get up, take your mat, and walk” (John 5.8). “Go and sin no more” (John 8.11).   Paul affirms Jesus’ pattern by reminding us in Philippians 2.12-13 that we are to “work out” our salvation with fear and trembling — not because it depends on us, but ...READ POST

The Perfect vs Progressive Church (yes, this is click bait) July 28, 2025 If you’re looking for the perfect church, you’re going to stay disappointed. Why? Because the Church was never meant to be perfect by your standards — it was meant to perfect you through Jesus.   Ephesians 5 doesn’t just give instructions for marriage — it paints a picture of how Jesus relates to his Bride, the Church. Ephesians 5.27 says he is “sanctifying her… so that he might present to himself the Church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle.” But how does he do that? Through a messy, perfectly imperfect, progressive relationship. It takes commitment. It takes mercy and grace. It takes forgiveness. It takes repentance and beings willing to be cleansed. It takes vulnerability.   Marriage doesn’t take two perfect people becoming one. It takes two imperfectly perfect people and, progressively, through maturity, mutual self-sacrifice, and preferring each other, creates the perfect marriage. Perfection, therefore, isn’t found in the destination; ...READ POST

What is a “church”? July 21, 2025 Last week, I wrote about how participating in a local church helps us gain victory over temptation and the enemy. So naturally, the question becomes: what IS “church”?   I’m not talking about the capital-C Church — the global, unseen Kingdom and body of Jesus that is made up of every believer across time and space. I’m talking about the local, visible, perfectly imperfect (read: usually offensive and often messy) Kingdom embassy that represents the global Church.   If you’ve ever wondered whether a group of six people meeting in a living room can really “count” as a church, the answer is yes… kinda. But not if it’s just a couple of Christian friends sitting in a pub watching a game, and one of them happens to yell “Jesus Christ” at the ref.   The New Testament doesn’t define church by stage lighting, programs, or building size. But it does describe a local gathering of believers ...READ POST

Church isn’t optional — it’s how we’re victorious! July 14, 2025 We often think of the Kingdom of God as a spiritual ideal or future hope, but Jesus invites us into something very real and now: His Kingdom — revealed through the local church. Think of the global Church as the Kingdom of God and your local church as an embassy of that Kingdom. It’s not a metaphor for a building; it’s a gathered people empowered by God to represent Jesus, not just individually but collectively.   In Ephesians 3.10, Paul makes a radical claim: “So that the multifaceted wisdom of God might now be made known through the church to the rulers and the authorities in the heavenly places.” Not through a quiet time. Not through personal devotion or Bible Study. But through the gathered church. The enemy isn’t just fighting you — it’s fighting us. And God’s answer to the attack on an individual soldier is “ya’ll”.   Later in Ephesians (6.12-17), Paul ...READ POST

Is your Christianity a crutch or a cross? July 7, 2025 I’ve been in church as far back as I can remember. With few exceptions, one common thread I have seen is the idea that becoming a Christian changes your life for the better. I understand that it is technically true. But at the same time, in a more real way, it is absolutely false.   This view lends credence to those who might say Christianity is a crutch — a life-bettering add-on for the weak or broken. But that perception couldn’t be further from the truth.   Following Jesus doesn’t guarantee comfort, ease, or success. In fact, Jesus promises the opposite: “In this world you will have trouble…” (John 16.33).   The Christian life often begins with disappointment; not because Jesus fails, but because we come into this lifestyle with the wrong expectations. Whether it’s from a misunderstanding or a wrong understanding of the Gospel, we expect fruitful blessings but end up facing painful pruning. We ...READ POST

Is your testimony an Instagram post? June 30, 2025 Taking family photos is like having an emergency tooth extraction… without pain killers… and it will probably (read: absolutely) cost you more money than you budgeted.   These “family bonding” moments are made even more “enjoyable” by the fact that you know that one person is determined to post the perfect photo to Instagram. That means dressing the kids, fixing everyone’s hair, sucking in your stomach, and begging your child to stop rolling in the dirt — all while being quietly yelled at (read: threatened) by that one person hissing directives under their breath. And after hours of chaos, sweat, erased tears, and forced smiles, the photographer finally captures one usable shot.   The final photo may look perfect, but it hides all the relatable details — the chaos, the tears, and the not-so-veiled threats of dismemberment. And yet, we post the polished picture and not the painful process that got us there.   Unfortunately, a ...READ POST

Is screen discipleship really a thing? June 23, 2025 About 20 years ago, my wife and I owned a production company. We created videos and designed graphics for churches and ministries (click the following link to view our super secret video project archive playlist: https://rumble.com/playlists/II8gOCGIiVo ). Additionally, we served as the creative directors for the church we attended. I prioritized everything to be the highest quality for online distribution.   I’m 41 now, and between life and ministry experience, I have discovered one BIG truth — while online is good in a pinch, in-person Spirit-led community is the key to real transformational freedom and spiritual maturity.   Staying home and watching church online while folding laundry while your kid is vomiting into a bowl isn’t bad (we’ve all been there) — but we cannot pretend it’s discipleship. Double-tapping a Bible verse or reposting a Christian quote by a famous Christian doesn’t equal evangelism. Following your favorite mega-pastor’s highlight reel is no substitute for ...READ POST

You weren’t designed for social media. June 16, 2025 Social media seemed to be a good idea for a generation that felt disconnected. It met a felt need. Facebook was for friends. Instagram was originally for unfiltered photos. Since then, we have been inundated with platforms that purport to “connect” us: Twitter, I mean X, Snapchat, TikTok, Pinterest, Telegram, LinkedIn, and more. Social media has trained us to believe more followers (think “bonds”) means more connection — when in reality, it’s the opposite.   Psychologists talk about Dunbar’s Number — the idea that the human brain can only maintain about 150 meaningful relationships. Beyond that and the emotional closeness and connection break down. Our digital lives may be full, but very little of it actually feeds the soul (I’m looking at you, Christian grazers who snack all day long on the dopamine hits of inspirational graphics, Scripture verses, quotes, and video clips).   Even Patrick (Yes, that St, Patrick of Ireland) seemed to ...READ POST

What if God parented like we do? June 9, 2025 Let’s be real: if God parented like we sometimes do — distracted, reactive, or just running the same script for every situation — we’d be in trouble. But thankfully, He doesn’t.   God parents us moment by moment. He’s not relying on a rigid formula. He’s present — paying attention to who we are, what we’re going through, and how best to guide us through it. Sometimes that means a gentle reminder. Other times, it’s consequences laced with compassion. But it’s always grace — not grace that enables bad behavior, but grace that shows up as undeserved attention, support, or assistance right when we need it most… and let’s be honest, sometimes painfully.   And that’s what being a Spirit-led parent looks like. We don’t parent from a one-size-fits-all playbook. We parent with presence, led by the Holy Spirit, so we can know when to comfort, when to correct, and when to just be ...READ POST

Temptation’s Coming — Do You Have an Exit Strategy? June 2, 2025 Let’s be honest — temptation can feel like an onslaught of exhausting and unstoppable attacks. And too many of us treat it like we’re supposed to overcome just by “trying harder”. Some of us have even been told, “just don’t do it”. What’s worse, depending upon the culture and people we are around, some of us have socially acceptable sins that are encouraged and applauded. But you weren’t designed to be victorious by yourself. You were designed to be more than a conqueror with community AND the Holy Spirit.   Here are some steps to help you create real, practical victory in your life:   1. Know What You’re Up Against (A Real Enemy) You have to first be honest. What kind of temptations are most common for you? (1 Corinthians 10.13). Identify the patterns and triggers (Proverbs 7.6-27). Is it a person, place, or time of day? Are you just tired or stressed out? ...READ POST

Wait… I Have to Repent for That? May 26, 2025 When most of us hear the word repentance, we imagine some big dramatic apology — tears, guilt, dramatic music swelling in the background. But sometimes, repentance looks a lot more like this super hypothetical situation: You’re in the kitchen, and your spouse (or loved one) comes into the kitchen at the same time, and you happen to step on their foot. You weren’t mad, it wasn’t on purpose, and you barely noticed. But then they look at you and ask if you will apologize.   Not because you were evil.   Not because you meant harm.   But because you did something that caused pain, albeit unintentionally.   That’s the heart of repentance in the Kingdom of God. It’s not just for the willful rebellion and deep betrayals (though it’s good for those, too). It’s also for when our words, decisions, or ignorance have hurt someone — or grieved God — even when that wasn’t our aim.   David prays ...READ POST

Talk to God like He’s real… cause He is. May 19, 2025 I used to have a friend who would wait for you to get done saying something, just so he could tell you what was already on his mind. His words would always come off feeling empty, pre-planned, and impersonal.   Do you have anyone in your life who only talks at you instead of with you?   Prayer gets frustrating when we do that with God. And yet, many of us wonder why our prayer life feels flat, like we’re leaving voicemails with God and hoping for a callback.   Here’s a wild idea: what if prayer is supposed to be a messy conversation?   That means asking questions — real ones — and even changing the question if it’s not getting an answer. Not because God’s dodging you or not understanding you, but because maybe it’s you who is learning to think and talk the way God does — the way He designed you to.   For example, instead ...READ POST

Prayer Isn’t a Vending Machine. It’s a Marriage. May 12, 2025 A lot of us treat prayer like that vending machine. We come with our selections, pay with the right “sacrifice” — good behavior, emotional sincerity, long enough prayers — and expect the desired outcome. And when it doesn’t happen? We get frustrated… maybe even shake the machine a bit.   But prayer isn’t transactional. It’s relational. Just like marriage, the real work actually begins after you say, “I do”. A healthy marriage is learning how to communicate with each other. And prayer is no different.   Your relationship with God deepens over time. You grow in your ability to hear Him, to trust His tone, to speak His language. Prayer isn’t just talking at God — it’s listening, waiting, and learning what matters most to Him.   Prayer isn’t like a vending machine and getting something — it’s a relationship where you get to know someone. Saying “I do” to Jesus is just the beginning. Real ...READ POST

Was That God… or Just a Bad Burrito? May 5, 2025 Wouldn’t it be easier if God always sounded like James Earl Jones with a thunderclap and a choir of angels behind Him? But more often than not, His voice sounds strangely familiar — like your own thoughts, but wiser, gentler, and usually with better timing… and maybe a bit of sarcasm if you’re wired that way.   Here’s the wild part: you were designed to hear Him. Jesus said, “My sheep hear My voice” (John 10:27). We start off hearing Him as children (usually referred to as our “conscience” — but then the noise of responsibility, life, and overthinking starts turning His volume down.   So how do we know it’s God speaking and not just last night’s spicy takeout?   Here are three ways to discern:   1. Is it consistent with His character and Scripture? The Holy Spirit won’t contradict Himself. If it sounds like grace, truth, and love — even when convicting — you’re probably on ...READ POST

Reading the Bible is like eating kale… April 28, 2025 Reading the Bible can feel a bit like eating kale: You know it’s good for you, it’s packed with nutrients… but if you don’t prepare it the right way for you, you’ll avoid eating it.   I like how Lacey makes kale chips in the oven — they are delicious and filling. Like kale, Scripture isn’t a one-recipe deal. Whether you sauté it, blend it, or drown it in ranch (spiritually speaking), there are several ways to take it that can fit your life and personality.   Here are three solid, Spirit-led options to help Scripture become a consistent part of your life — not just a you have to choke down because it’s healthy:   1. Eye Reading – Pick a Translation That Speaks to You “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” – Psalm 119.105   Some people love the precise, word-for-word approach of the NASB (https://www.bible.com/bible/100/JHN.1.NASB1995) or ESV (https://www.bible.com/bible/59/JHN.1.ESV) ...READ POST

The Most Boringly Powerful Christian Answer To Your Problem April 21, 2025 You know what almost never trends on social media? Faithfulness.   It’s not flashy. It doesn’t look like a miracle. It’s not the highlight reel you want to post. But when it comes to following Jesus, the most powerful, transformative tool in your spiritual arsenal might just be this: showing up again tomorrow.   No magic prayer fixes everything overnight. There’s no Bible verse, worship song, or Bible study that zaps away every struggle in a single sitting. Most of the Christian life isn’t a highlight — it’s a habit. A holy, gritty, non-glamorous habit of just showing up.   Here’s how to keep going when everything in you wants a shortcut:   1. Keep Your Eyes on Jesus “Let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus…” (Hebrews 12.1–2) Don’t let your progress, your pain, or your lack of results be your measure. Let Him be your focus.   2. Show Up, Even ...READ POST

You don’t appreciate breathing… until you can’t April 14, 2025 Most of you know I have cystic fibrosis, a genetic, terminal disease that results in an overproduction of thick, sticky mucus. This mucus affects most of my body’s organs and systems, including the lungs. As a result, I spend anywhere from 2-4 hours a day doing respiratory treatments that help clear my lungs and prevent infection. When I am exhausted, I usually skip one of these therapies. In the first few hours, I feel fine. However, by hour 12 after not doing a treatment, my chest is heavy, my energy is drained, and I am short of breath. You see, my therapies are not just for when symptoms flare up — they are to prevent them from flaring up in the first place.   Our daily times of solitude with Jesus work the same way. We might feel okay in the moment, but without that regular, daily “spiritual therapy” — praise & ...READ POST

Feel Under Attack? Here’s How to Win. April 7, 2025 A few months ago, I learned a painful lesson in tool selection. I was using a multi-tool saw with a flat-head screwdriver as a pry-bar (because that seemed like a creative and “outside-the-box” thinking I am generally good at). Something was stuck in a hole I had drilled, and I figured I could just quickly wedge it out. I was very, very wrong.   Problem one: The multi-tool saw didn’t have a locking mechanism, which meant it folded shut under any amount of misapplied pressure.   Problem two: The serrated blade was extremely sharp (which is usually a good thing when you’re actually attempting to cut something). So, when I applied pressure the saw snapped closed — past (read: “through”) the tip of my finger — I realized two things very quickly: I was using the wrong tool and the tip of my finger (including nail) had been quickly and cleanly sheared off (except ...READ POST

So… Why Isn’t Everything Fixed Yet? March 31, 2025 Imagine being diagnosed with a life-threatening tumor. The surgeon removes it, and you’re declared cancer-free. But even though the disease is gone, your body still needs time to heal. The battle is over, but the process isn’t finished.   That’s exactly where we stand in Jesus as believers. He has already fulfilled everything the Scriptures prophesied — sin is defeated, death has lost its sting, and we are fully redeemed. But we’re still in the “recovery” period, longing for the final restoration of all things.   Romans 8.16-25 reminds us that creation itself groans for the day when everything will be made right. We have been saved, but we still wait with eager hope for the full realization of our redemption. So how do we live in this tension?   Rest in What’s Already Done Your sin is forgiven, your future is secure, and you belong to Christ. “For in hope we have been saved” (Romans 8.24). ...READ POST

Are you flawed? March 24, 2025 Peloton bikes are great — if your goal is to spend thousands of dollars to sweat buckets while also not going anywhere. But if you actually want to go somewhere, give me a motorized bike any day. Seriously, why would I pedal like Lance Armstrong without steroids trying to win the Tour de France, yet literally go nowhere when I could ride an electric-powered bike around town with the optional seat backrest and front/rear baskets to carry by computer bag and groceries? (hypothetically speaking, of course.)   Yet, that’s exactly how so many of us live — striving, pushing, and exhausting ourselves while trying to be “empowered” by success, attraction, money, marriage, kids, health, food, or achievements. It might look like progress (read: “success”), but it’s just pressure without real movement (read: “maturity” or “fulfillment”). The truth is, real fulfillment comes from living how we were designed — sacrificially dependent on the ...READ POST

Selling Life Insurance to Dead People is Dumb March 17, 2025 I have several friends who work in sales — car salesmen, realtors, insurance agents, and cybersecurity. Their job is all about finding the right audience and making a compelling pitch. I can’t imagine how I would respond if one of them came to me and said, “I’ve discovered the perfect clientele — people who will never argue, never walk away, or hang up the phone. I’m heading to a cemetery, setting up a table, and selling to those buried there.”   Absolutely absurd, right? No matter how good my friends are at selling, dead people can’t buy anything. And yet, that’s exactly how sin treats Christians. It keeps trying to sell us its lies — as if we were still capable of buying them. But in Christ, we are dead to sin and alive to God (Romans 6.11). Sin has no power over us… unless ...READ POST

Faith Isn’t Safe — And That’s a Good Thing March 10, 2025 Remember that scene in Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YpzBQamQpk0) where Indy has to step out over what looks like a bottomless pit? The map says there’s a bridge, but he can’t see it. He hesitates, takes a deep breath, and then… he steps out. The bridge was there all along. That’s faith. It’s not seeing the whole plan but trusting the One who does.   Faith in Jesus isn’t about playing it safe — it’s about risking comfort, growing in maturity, and enduring trials, all of which are refined through suffering and opposition. Here’s how to recognize where fear, self-sufficiency, or wrong beliefs may be holding you back from fully trusting the Holy Spirit:   Ask: Where Am I Playing It Safe? Faith grows when we step beyond our comfort zone and trust God. Are you avoiding risks because of fear? “For God has not given us a spirit of timidity, but of ...READ POST

You Become Like Who You’re Around March 3, 2025 When I was first learning to teach, I mimicked the preachers and teachers I admired most — right down to their clothes, glasses, cadence, and gestures. If they paced the stage a certain way, so did I. If they used dramatic pauses and contemplative questions, I threw them in too. I thought I was being original, but really, I was just a reflection of those who had allowed to influence me. If you want a good laugh, click the following link to watch one of my earliest recorded teachings from 2010: https://cultivaterelationships.com/teachings/20100314-an-introduction-to-prayer/   Whether we realize it or not, we become like the people we admire and spend time with. The question is — are we choosing the right people to shape us? Here’s how to seek out and learn from the right people:   Find Godly Examples to Follow – Look for people whose lives reflect a dependence upon the Holy Spirit (in ...READ POST

The Art of a Spirit-Led Apology February 24, 2025 When I was first married, I hated apologizing for something that seemingly wasn’t my fault. For instance, when my wife and I would walk past each other, and her foot happened to fall under mine, she would look at me, indignant that I wouldn’t apologize for stepping on her foot. I would gaze back at her and explain that since I didn’t intentionally step on her foot, I had nothing to apologize for.   This didn’t go well for me.   To my wife, it came off that I was more interested in being right than the fact that I had just hurt her (whether intentionally or not). My reluctance stemmed from childhood; I felt my dad apologized too casually, and I wanted my apologies to be sincere and meaningful. Over time, I’ve learned that motive doesn’t negate effect — if I’ve hurt someone (regardless of intent), an apology is often the first step ...READ POST

Confession: Not Just Something To Do After We Sin February 17, 2025 I recently had to move a piano. I knew doing it myself would end up in my death… or at minimum, a very high emergency room bill that would inevitably lead to hernia surgery. So I called my friends. I have learned to deal with temptation the same way — struggling alone makes victory unnecessarily harder, but bringing someone in makes the burden lighter.   We often think of confession as something we do after we’ve sinned, but real freedom comes when we confess the temptation… before we sin. The enemy thrives in secrecy, but when we bring the whisper of the enemy (the temptation) into the light, it loses its power. Here’s how to confess in a way that fuels freedom:   1. Confess to the Right People – Find someone mature, encouraging, and Spirit-filled who can hold you accountable — whether it’s a mentor, pastor, or trusted friend. “Therefore confess your sins ...READ POST

God’s Love Puts Us First February 10, 2025 Several years ago, one of my daughters had asked for a glass of coke before bed. I explained that there is no such thing as bedtime coke. She stared at me with big, confused eyes, completely unaware that my denying her something so sweet was for her good. In a way, we’re a lot like my daughter with God’s love — sometimes struggling to understand that His “no” is just as loving as His “yes.”   God’s love for us is bigger than we often realize. It isn’t based on our performance, and it doesn’t waver with our mistakes. Real love, as He defines it, is the denial of ourselves — our rights, desires, beliefs, and expectations — for the benefit of others. And He demonstrated that love perfectly through Jesus. But to live fully in that love, we first have to receive it.   Here are three ways to learn how to receive ...READ POST

God Untangles Life’s Knots (Even the Ones We Create) February 3, 2025 One of my biggest pet peeves used to be untangling my earbuds after discovering them carelessly tossed into my computer bag. As much as I wanted to blame my wife or daughters for the mess, the truth was, it was my own fault. I simply didn’t take the time to roll them up neatly and store them in their little travel case. That small act of avoidance led to the impossible knot. Life can feel like that too — messy, frustrating, and tempting to ignore. But thankfully, God is a professional knot untangler.   God’s design for you is to live free — free from offense, loss, and grief (also known as life’s knots) — and to experience a full, fulfilling, and purpose-filled life in Him. While challenges in life are inevitable, He desires that we don’t remain bound by them. Instead, He calls us to trust Him, release control of our ...READ POST

The Power of Giving Thanks January 27, 2025 In the face of difficult people and circumstances, giving thanks to God can feel like the last thing we want to do. Yet, it’s in those moments of difficulty that gratitude holds the greatest power. Choosing to thank God —even despite circumstances — doesn’t ignore the pain; it redirects our focus back to His unchanging goodness.   Here are three steps to help you give thanks, even amidst difficulty:   1. Acknowledge the Reality – Be honest with God about your struggles. He invites us to pour out our hearts to Him (Psalm 62.8), and gratitude doesn’t mean ignoring the challenges you face.   2. Remember God’s Character – Reflect on who God has been in your life — faithful, loving, and constant. Thanksgiving shifts our focus from how dark our valley is to the greatness of the One who is walking with us in the valley. Remember, “Give thanks to the Lord, for He is ...READ POST

Colorblind and Unresolved Issues — How Are You Harming Those Around You January 20, 2025 As someone who’s colorblind, I’ve learned that not seeing certain colors can be dangerous. Like when I can’t tell the difference between red and yellow flashing lights at night — so I don’t know if I should stop or if we can nonchalantly drive through an intersection. Our unresolved issues are similar to being colorblind. They can blind us from knowing the red flags in our circumstances and relationships without us realizing it. This blindness can harm or hinder our relationships with God and others.   Maybe an unanswered prayer left you doubting God’s goodness or faithfulness. Perhaps a past betrayal or rejection makes feeling cared for in relationships seem out of reach. These unresolved moments can quietly linger, influencing how we respond to others and our perception of God’s character.   Before this “colorblindness” can be healed, we have to first acknowledge that there may be an unresolved issue in our lives. Helping ...READ POST

Struggling To Cultivate A Heart After God? January 13, 2025 Have you ever admired someone’s heart for God and thought, “I wish I could have that kind of faith”? Here’s the good news: you can!   David wasn’t perfect, but his humility, devotion, and reliance on the Holy Spirit made him a man after God’s heart. This is a lifestyle we’re all invited to embrace. Here are three simply (but not easy) steps you can take to help you grow deeper in your relationship with God (and develop a heart that reflects Him better):   1. Daily Prayer and Worship – Just like David poured out his heart to his Heavenly Father, we can connect with Him through honest and heartfelt prayer and worship each day. (Click here the following link to access our powerful worship playlist on Spotify to enhance your times of worship: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5U2jVayGGegWajsNP2whPc)   2. Meditating on the Scriptures – David loved the Scriptures. He allowed them to guide his life as he ...READ POST

What’s your word for the year? January 6, 2025 As we enter a brand-new year, I want to encourage you to take some time to pray and ask God for a “word” for the year ahead. I usually ask God to give me something to focus my prayers and vision for the year. This year, the word was “HOPE”. This word has a lot of personal significance to me — it’s both a challenge and a comfort.   This God-given word can be something to focus on, grow in, or hold onto as you navigate the ups and downs of the coming months. It might be a word like peace, faith, trust, or courage—something specific that the Holy Spirit places on your heart to guide and inspire you.   Having a God-given word for the year can help bring clarity and intentionality as you make decisions and set goals. It’s a simple yet powerful way to align your heart and mind with what ...READ POST